Ahhhh, you’re in a new relationship and all things seem so wonderful! You may be feeling those butterflies in your stomach, you laugh at all your partner’s jokes, feel warm and tingly inside. This is the time that you truly feel and believe that you may have met the right one! Maybe he seems to display all the qualities about what women really want in a man. But, we’ve also been there and done that. All new relationships feel great, which is why we call it the “Honeymoon” phase.
That phase doesn’t last forever. Your relationship evolves over time and you want to get off on the right foot. The following 5 Essential early relationship tips will help guide and nourish your relationship in the early stages with your new partner.
Essential Early Relationship Tip #1: Always be yourself
At any stage, it’s important that you are always yourself. This is not the time to pretend to be someone that you’re not just because you don’t want to risk losing this person. If you are not yourself, you will have a very difficult time pretending to be someone that you’re not for the entirety of the relationship. An example of that would be if you said that you LIKED to travel when you are afraid of flying! You can only make up a certain number of excuses before your partner clues in to the fact that you don’t like to fly or travel.
If you are going above and beyond and in essence being “phony” just to impress your partner in the early stages, well you’re only making things difficult on yourself because your new beau actually believes that you are sweet and romantic ALL THE TIME. And the minute that you start to relax and return to your normal average niceness, it will be noticed immediately. I’ve heard countless complaints from couples and singles about how their partner changed over time. Well he “used to” open car doors for me and bring me flowers and all of a sudden one day it stopped. Please do yourself a favour and do not false advertise. This is a sure way for your relationship to come to an eventual end, and will be looking for advice on relationship problems.
You are at the early stage of a relationship. If you are thinking long term, you will have lots of time to impress your partner and give them attention and affection and occasional surprises for the length of the relationship. If you pull out all the stops up front, you will be struggling and challenged to keep it up. If you are yourself, you are comfortable and natural and this goes a lot further than pretending to be someone you’re not. You will come across as phony and also confuse your partner when you stop with the charade. If your goal is to be in a long-term relationship, then you would want to know that your new partner really likes you for who you truly are and accepts you as is.
Essential Early Relationship Tip #2: Spend & Make quality time for each other
For any relationship to grow, you need to spend quality time with one another. If you are unable to spend a lot of time with one another because you are in a long distance relationship, make sure that you read our long distance relationship tips. You are in the early stages of a budding relationship, so making time for one another not only shows that you care for this person, but it’s an excellent way to develop your friendship and get to know this person to determine compatibility. If you are like most people who are very busy, you may want to dedicate a date night with your partner, and be sure that you can stick to your plans.
Essential Early Relationship Tip #3: Have a life!
What attracts most people to someone is the fact that they have a life! What that means is that your life doesn’t revolve around your other half. Too many people at the early stages make the mistake of dropping everything and being totally “on call” for their other half. I can tell you that this is NOT a good move nor is it very healthy or attractive. Your family and friends are important and should not be tossed to the side or “ditched” just because you’re in a new relationship. In fact, you can be inclusive with your partner, at a comfortable pace, but do not suffocate your partner with demands of spending time together and being joined at the hip. This is not to say that you can’t spend a great amount of time together if you both agree and genuinely enjoy spending time together. It just means that you should not dismiss friends and family if they want to spend time with you also. You also do not want to give your partner the guilt trip if they want to spend time with their family and friends. This is normal in the early stages. You can’t expect to be invited to every function while you are still getting to know one another, and you can’t be disappointed if they don’t want to meet your family and hang out with your friends just yet. Be conscious of the time you spend together and allow for enough space which your partner can truly appreciate.
Essential Early Relationship Tip #4: Always be clear
In the early stages you want to make sure that you have very open communication. If you are always clear about your goals, your likes, your dislikes and your feelings, you will always know where you stand in that relationship. It is not a time to “hide” things from your partner. If you have certain habits and regular activities such as smoking, or a regular card night with the boys, or going to Church on Sundays then you want to be honest and upfront and share with your partner things that are important to you and anything that is routine in your life. It is extremely important to communicate and be very clear about your relationship goals. If you are not looking for a long-term relationship or you are ONLY interested in a marriage partner and want to have kids and a family right away, you want to make sure that you are on the same page. This doesn’t mean that you scare this person off by sharing popular baby names for boys or looking in the Real Estate section of your newspaper asking what your partner thinks of the new house you’d like to move into. It just means that before you start to invest time, feelings and financial resources on your partner, make sure that you agree on the important things and that you share core values.
Essential Early Relationship Tip #5: Go with the Flow
Communication and trust are the foundations of any successful relationship. You can read all about the do’s and don’ts and read all the rules out there about dating and still be completely lost or feel that it may not apply to your situation. Everyone’s views on relationships vary slightly or greatly so the best advice I can share with you is to go with the flow and also listen to your gut. You should always be in tune with how this person makes you feel. What does your gut say? What are your thoughts about this person and what are your thoughts about relationships in general? If you’ve been hurt in the past, do not make the mistake of stereo typing your partner as a cheater, or treating them as if they’re guilty because you lack trust. Learn from your past experiences and don’t repeat them. You are in a new situation with a totally different person so playing the comparison game is not good.
Remember to always have fun and take things lightly. This is an exciting time so enjoy every moment and don’t forget these essential tips to help you through this amazing time!