If you are having challenges in your current relationship and you’re seeking advice on relationship problems continue reading as we’re here to help you understand and learn some of the tips to solve some of your challenges. Depending on the challenges you are going through you will need to seek specific advice. Your challenges could be about a number of different areas in the relationship that you have conflict with such as communication, sex and money. We are going to provide you with some general tips to solving some of your relationship problems.
Let’s begin with the basic challenge that most couples seek advice in relationship problems which is communication. There are many resources available to people to help improve communication skills. It’s important that if you are trying to resolve an issue, that you are aware of how to speak to one another and respect each others opinion. You should never speak to each other in a condescending or negative tone or raise your voice as this type of communication usually only escalates and heightens the negative vibes. Some people may even shut down or tune out, when they hear this type of communication. A lot of couples are advised to use a mediator to help resolve issues. Someone of course that is impartial and that is considerate of both parties interest. What’s important is to listen and appreciate both views and come to a compromise or solution that is agreeable to both parties. Often communication breakdown is a result of a lack of understanding or an assumption or misinterpretation of an action or statement. Asking questions is a great way to make sure that you are both on the same page and that you are clear on what exactly is bothering the other person.
So some key tips to resolving communication break down is to be attentive and a good listener. Ask for clarity and understanding of the problem. Speak to each other in a soft tone and allow the other person an opportunity to express their views in a safe environment. Use a mediator if necessary or you cannot seem to resolve the problem between the two of you.
Common advice on relationship problems could begin with the person who has the problem. There are a few questions that I would ask when dealing with the relationship problem.
1. What is the problem?
2. Who has the problem?
3. What can be done about it?
(create a solution)
4. What is being done about it?
5. Come up with a solution.
6. Implement right away and manage the results
There are some problems in relationships that boil down to the individual who has the problem. Sometimes the problem is because the person is not happy with the situation or their partner, and feel that they are not paying attention to their needs. In many cases the unhappiness is due to the person with the problem who is unhappy with themselves.
Before you point the finger at anyone else and start playing the blame game, my first advice is to always look in the mirror. Could the problem possibly be with the reflection in the mirror?
I’ll give you an example of this. So your angry and upset that your partner isn’t being attentive and you feel that there isn’t enough intimacy in your relationship. YET, you make no effort to complement your partner or pay attention to his needs and you’ve let yourself go because you have no time, but you want him to tell you how beautiful you are in your flannel pajamas and really old pair of house shoes and your hair tied back in the tightest un-sexiest pony tail all evening? OR you expect that your partner somehow has developed psychic ability and is able to read your mind and know exactly what you are thinking and feeling at all times, when you rarely discuss your feelings and are the type of person to bottle things up to avoid conflict.
The challenge with many problems surrounding relationships is we make a lot of assumptions and are guilty of taking advantage of the other person or taking them for granted. A relationship involves co-operation and open communication. It is too easy to take a relationship for granted. When you understand what men want in women and what women really want in men, you may solve a number of your relationship problems. After all, if you are going to decide to be in a relationship, shouldn’t you know the rules of the game and the nature of your players?
Another great bit of advice on relationship problems is that there is no room for ego in a relationship. Many challenges in a relationship is due to a battle of the ego. Ego can kill a relationship if you allow it to get in the way. You need to be mindful of the ego and make sure that it’s not peeping its ugly head, particularly in the case of conflict. Your ego can prevent you from listening to your partner’s opinion and put yourself in a defensive mode. This does not make a great environment for resolving problems. Ego is often associated with many negative traits such as anger, hatred, jealousy, control, judgment and negative thoughts and feelings. If you want to have a loving romantic relationship, there is no room for ego.
We hope that we’ve shared some valuable advice on relationship problems and you are able to better understand and appreciate your partner. If you implement some of the tips we’ve shared to resolve conflict, we know you will be on your way to a healthier happier dating and relationship experience with your partner. Feel free to share your thoughts and views with us and if you have any specific relationship problems you’d like us to help you with, we’d love to hear about it and get back to you with our advice.